The Choice is Yours

And he said, “O Lord, God of my master Abraham, grant me success today, I pray Thee, and show steadfast love to my master Abraham.

Genesis 24:12 (RSV)

It was a Sunday, after church. A young woman went to see her father and told him that a young man had come to her, claiming that God had revealed to him that she was destined to become his wife. Her father asked her to go fetch the young man and bring him to him. His first question, upon seeing the young man, was: "You know neither my daughter nor her family. How can you be certain that God has chosen her to be your wife?" Fearing the father's reaction, the young man replied that God had revealed it to him in a dream. He added that it was his daughter's very face he had seen standing by his side, before the officiant. With a skeptical smile, the father simply pointed out that God does not choose our spouse for us; rather, He guides us through the process that leads us to make our own choices.

This is a reality we frequently encounter these days: men and women—whether the latter are searching for a "man of God" or the former are seeking a "submissive wife"—often allow themselves to be swept away by the very first sentimental impulse that seizes them when they meet someone with whom they would like to start a family. Everything they perceive becomes, in their eyes, a sign from God. Although Isaac was the child of the divine promise to give Abraham an heir, at no point did God reveal—neither to Abraham nor to Sarah—who was destined to become his wife. The choice of a wife for his son rested far more on her background and origins than on any specific individual God might have designated for Isaac. Many make the mistake of claiming that God has spoken to them regarding the person they love.

You may have a very specific person in mind; it is not inappropriate to have an idea of ​​the kind of person you wish to marry. However, do not assume that the mere fact of dreaming about such a person—or feeling a strong attraction in their presence—means that this comes from God. You may certainly turn to God and ask Him to guide you toward the type of person He has intended for you, but He will never tell you exactly whom to choose. Ultimately, the choice is yours. When Abraham sent his servant, he did not have any specific person in mind; likewise, when the servant prayed to God for help, he did not specifically have Rebecca in mind, but simply hoped that God would lead him to meet the ideal person for Isaac. He simply had faith that God would lead him to find a person after Abraham's very own heart. Ask God to guide you in your choice, rather than asking Him to give you the specific person you desire.

May God's grace and peace be with you.