More Than Just a Chance

Then Peter came to Jesus and asked, “Lord, how many times shall I forgive my brother or sister who sins against me? Up to seven times?”

Matthew 18:21 (NIV)

During a conference on family life, the guest pastor emphasized the mutual forgiveness that must exist within a couple if they are to successfully overcome even the most difficult obstacles. He provided numerous examples, drawn from both biblical and social contexts. At the conclusion of the conference, a woman approached him to ask if she was obligated to forgive her husband every time he was unfaithful to her. He replied: "As long as you remain committed to him and still consider him your husband, you must forgive him—again and again." It came as a real shock!

This is a reality we often encounter in people: they wish to make a decision, yet constantly seek out someone with a solid reputation to give them permission to do so. This is exactly what happened to this woman. She fully expected the pastor to openly grant her the option to leave. But the answer she received was not to her liking. Peter, too, found himself in this very same situation. He was not ready to forgive those who had wronged him; yet, he wanted Jesus to grant him His seal of approval—something that would have given him the upper hand over his enemies.

How many times have you caught yourself searching for Bible verses that would validate your decision not to forgive someone who has offended you? We have all been there, at one point or another in our lives. And sometimes, even if we wish to forgive, we still harbor a desire to see the other person suffer the consequences of their actions. Simply ask yourself: "What if God had decided not to forgive us, or had chosen to make us pay for our sins?" You and I would never benefit from His grace. While Peter suggested a limit of "seven times"—thereby offering his enemy at least one chance—Jesus, by adding "seventy-seven times seven times," clearly demonstrated to him that simply offering a chance does not constitute the true solution; rather, it is loving with all one's heart that enables us to forgive without limit. Justifying oneself for offering only a single chance is not part of God's plan of forgiveness.

May God's grace and peace be with you.